billie holiday/weakness

Joined : 03 Jan 2007 Posts : 640

last night i finally watched lady sings the blues. i almost turned it off i was so pissed. now, i'm not that familiar with billie holiday's life and i'm not sure how accurately she was depicted in the movie (i'm gonna go pick up a biography from the library this afternoon to get a better idea and understanding.) but her character really made me mad... i do not see her story as a tragic one...instead, i see her as a weak woman who let her vices control her. she had the support of numerous people who tried to help her do the right thing, and pointed her in the right direction, and instead she repeatadly chose to do the 'wrong' thing. how many times does one need to get burned by fire in order to learn their lesson? i just don't get it.

this movie has helped me recognize something in myself. in watching it, i realized that i despise weak people. and i understand that everyone has flaws, and that everyone can't be strong in all aspects of their life, but i don't understand how people cannot be strong enough to learn from their mistakes and weigh the choices presented before them.

the men that i deal with are all (or have been) physically strong, i despise and will not deal with a man that displays b*tch tendencies. the women that i deal with do not whine or b*tch and will take charge of situations when and if need be. i don't tolerate liars or people who cannot overcome their addictions, nor do i keep them in my circle - whether they be family or friends.

in a sense, i am worried that i am becomming intolerant. (even if it's just intolerance for bullsh*t, intolerance is still unacceptable in my book.) so, in realizing that, I am trying to get a better understanding as to why folks do what they do. i also try to remember what a good friend once told me. she said "alyson...not everyone is as strong as you." i looked at her like she was crazy. i don't think i'm 'strong'. i just choose to do what needs to be done to make any given situation better (whether for myself or someone else) and i honestly can't fathom how other people cannot choose to do the same.
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alyson...

"yesterday was practice."
~ jg

Subject: Re: billie holiday/weakness Thu Jun 26, 2008 12:30 pm

For some people, once they figure out what they should be doing, it's hard to do otherwise. They see a goal, pot a course, and start their journey.

For other people, it's not so easy. They may see the goal, but they find obstacles in the way. Sometimes there are obvious obstacles, so people sympathize for a person in a bad situation. Other times, they are less obvious - maybe psychological, maybe self-created. In those cases, sympathy is harder to find because people can't understand why the person is not achieving the goal.

It can be hard to get out of your own head to imagine what obstacles another person might see. When you're not doing the wrong thing, it may not be as obvious to you that the wrong thing has a certain allure. When you're the type of person who will tackle any challenge, it can be hard to understand that fear makes some people freeze up when faced with a challenge.

I think one of the most important things to do when trying to understand someone else's choices is to try to think like them. Many people say things like "if I was in that situation . . ." This way of thinking won't lead to understanding because if you were in that situation, then you'd have your thoughts, knowledge and experience.
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Joined : 03 Jan 2007 Posts : 640

thanks...that was real talk...i'm learning and trying. i'll let you know if my feelings changed once i read the book...
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alyson...

"yesterday was practice."
~ jg

Subject: Re: billie holiday/weakness Thu Jun 26, 2008 3:18 pm

Keep in mind - that was all general. I don't know Billie Holiday's story. I could end up having the same impression of her.
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Joined : 07 Jan 2007 Posts : 596 Localisation : over philly

it's been a while since i've seen that movie, but my most lasting memory of it is how the drugs whupped her ass. what's funny to me is that i am less impatient with her in this movie than i've been with my own family members - the crack smokers, the smack addict. maybe it's 'cause the movie is so far removed from my personal experience.

sometimes it's hard to put yourself in someone else's shoes. especially when by doing so, you run the risk of taking that kind of empathy to an extreme and then enabling the person you really wish you could change.

Joined : 03 Jan 2007 Posts : 1617 Localisation : Illadelph

I read one of the Diana Ross biographies and I read that Berry Gordy had that script significantly altered...for Diana. I don't know if it made Billie's life look better or worse than it actually was....there was talk about there being a discrepancy with the stories about the men in her life

Joined : 08 Jan 2007 Posts : 406

i remember seeing this portrayal of billie by diana. yeah al, i agree that she did look weak. her achievements outside of heroin made her a heroine but when it came to that needle she was lost. diana went straight back to the projects alleyway with that one. (any Oscar nods for that there? Question

)
i watched a biography about billie. there was a friend of hers who talked about jus how bad a jones she had. He revealed that offstage (and onstage at times) she was as any other dope fiend.
at the end of the documentary someone said that when she died there was money stashed in her vagina, a common practice among women who shoot dope.
i think that star power especially when viewed in the retrospective sense is tricky. it buffers the real. we see and hear about celebreties who live that rock star, addicted, back to the rehab, party lifestyle and to us their ugly isnt as ugly as the up close and personal ugly of the addict we know (and may love).
close your eyes. picture in you mind a superstar, dead or alive, who is or was allegedly an addict of drugs and/or alchohol. now, strip them down to what you consider to be the rock bottom image of that addiction.
place that image atop your now ravaged, stinking, stealing, begging, diseased, turn-a-trick superstar.
it's not the same, is it?
but take away an addicted star's loot and they would still be an addict-jus without the shine.
Like a Star @ heaven

lindsay lohan on the ho stroll under the K&A el stop in kensington, two days after going AWOL from her third rehab-in a year
Like a Star @ heaven

lil wayne on syrup and pills foaming at the mouth, leanin' on the chinese joint plastic window ordering his food
"4 wings, 2 Dutch's and a Lollipop... 4 wings, 2 Dutch's and a Lollipop..."
Like a Star @ heaven

kurt cobain smelling like piss, in a raggedy, dirty flannel fleece jacket, on a subway bench using a newspaper for a pillow, having lucid suicidal ideations, humming the never released, "Smells Like Teen Spirit"
~(put your Like a Star @ heaven

here.)
yeah al, i see what you mean. she looked weak because that side of an addict can be that damn weak.
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