How long does it take before giving someone a set of keys to the house or car?

Is love/trust the deciding factor?

A few things have to be in place for me to give her a key

- I need to trust her enough to leave her alone in my home
- I need to know that she knows and respects what is appropriate and acceptable to me when it comes to use of that key
- I need to be ready for the kind of commitment that shared keys implies

Because of that last part, if I wasn't ready to give a woman a key to my home, I wouldn't accept a key to hers.

it's all about trust. their are family members that i wouldn't leave in my home alone let alone give them their own key.

i have left my key with friends for various reasons, but they all respect me enough to respect my stuff. and i guess the fact that they're FRIENDS and not significant others contributes to that decision.

For me, no keys are being given out - unless you paying for something, and I'm still skeptical about that because the first thing somebody does when they get a key is make copies - and if the person turns out to be crazy, then you have to get your locks changed.

I would feel the same way, even if someone gave me their key, it would not make me feel obligated to give them a key.

I'm cool. I don't need to be all up in their world, dropping by unannounced with "surprise" visits and vice-versa. My thing is, if we live together - that's one thing, but if we don't, then I can respect a man's space, privacy...and I would want the same.

The trust will come. I just don't need to give up a key to show that.

I've had keys, but I didn't ask for them, and I never gave mine up. When I did use them, I always called first hours or a day ahead.

www.myspace.com/trayceelynn

Yeah.. we need to be living together. Otherwise there's no reason.

Here's a scenario:
My lady comes over to spend the evening/night together. She has her laptop so she can take care of whatever she's working on, clothes for work the next day, and the clothes she's wearing. The next morning we both go to work. Some of my co-workers want to go to happy hour afterwards.

option 1 - my lady can't get her stuff until I get home late that night
option 2 - she carries a bunch of crap to work
option 3 - I change my plans so I can let her in to get her stuff
option 4 - we don't bother spending the night together because it's just too difficult (this time and every other time a similar situation arises)
option 5 - give her a key

Options 1 - 4 are not desireable. 5 makes things easier on both of us. If I'm going to take a more difficult/inconveniant option over an easier one, I always need an explicit reason. If our relationship isn't at a point where I could trust her to act right with a key, OK, that's a reason. If I don't want to give her the impression that our relationship is more serious than it is, that'd be a reason too. But, if our relationship is serious and I do trust her, why not give her the key?

That's the question for all of you in the no-key-ever camp - in a situation like this, why would you not give the key?

tizzy, you are too funny...

I've recieved keys but never gave them out. Even tho i had them, I still gave a warning about when i'd be arriving. A call was always placed before i showed up. I dont do the "pop up" thing because i hate when people do that to me.
If you pop up unannounced, its a strong chance that you wont be let in.
I simply wont answer the door. You have to respect peoples space.
Thats not my twist at all.

Well my shit was easy. My and I were long distance before we shared a spot. My building had a security door. Since they only gave us two keys to the security door.....I had to be there to let him in the building because my lil sis had the other security key in case something went wrong at my crib. It didn't much matter to me and my King since our visits had to be well planned out anyways and you don't keep it going with someone that lives that far away(Detroit Suburbs to Chester, Pa...that's like 9hrs of driving on a good day or one expensive ass flight to be taking atleast once a month) if it ain't about nothin'. If ya do ya crazy in my opinion.